Month: March 2011

 Taking the Stage

We started down this path without knowing where it would lead us.  One year we were at the St. Patrick’s Day parade with our three year old girl who was completely taken by the Irish dancers. The Irish dancing schools didn’t start lessons until children were five. She was still interested when she turned five and she started taking classes.  That first year, we went to watch our first Irish dance competition after learning that Irish dance was competitive. (Who knew?)  We walked into a world we didn’t know existed.  We are now part of that world. 

The St. Patrick’s Day parade is no longer something we watch but something we do. 

And here is our girl, competitor #831, dancing the treble jig last weekend at a local Irish dance competition. 

   Treble Jig

I asked her this morning what she liked about dancing. She said, “The steps, my friends, the competitions… everything.”

Wigs

Maybe not everything.  She’s not a fan of wearing a big curly wig.  It has to be pinned on tight.  It’s part of the costume and she puts up with it until the first possible moment she can take it off.  

I still don’t know where this path is going. It’s been a surprising one so far, and not one I would have imagined myself on a few years ago.  But, she loves it.  (Her grandparents do too and fund the project.  There are shirts sold at competitions that say, “I don’t dance – I finance.”)  So, we’re following her and enjoying what love looks like.

I find dance a visually compelling and challenging subject. It’s hard to capture the motion of the dancing, the lighting conditions are usually difficult and often using a flash isn’t possible. But, I keep trying. For stage photos, I use manual exposure since the dark stage invariable fools the meter that everything is dark and the main subject is overexposed. And, many of the photos are destined for deletion. But, again, the beauty of digital is that there is no harm in trying and trying and trying.

We went on a walk to see some spring flowers but I was more taken by these little blossoms.

A Little Spring

Spin Spin Spin

It Was Time

I’m getting ready for our new baby.  I made appointments to go the dentist and got everyone’s hair cut.  These are small matters that will become herculean tasks with a newborn on the scene.

I don’t cut my own kids’ hair.  I’ve tried to from time to time but I don’t get very far before realizing that I’m in over my head and take them to someone else.  I know it’s something that I could learn to do.  It would make life a little easier.  I wouldn’t have to take them anywhere or pay anyone.  I wouldn’t wait so long between cuts and if I was good at it I wouldn’t walk away from the cut thinking, “Well, that’s not what I had in mind.”

But, I don’t learn.  Why?  Mistakes.  I’m not willing to make enough mistakes to get good at it.  I’d rather not hear, “I can see you gave your kids haircuts.” My mom used to cut our hair.  The evidence is in the family photo albums.  I have crooked bangs in my class pictures.

I take my kids to someone who has made mistakes so I don’t have to make my own.

I love taking photos.  I don’t mind making mistakes.  I feel like there’s nothing to lose but disk space.  I realize that not everyone wants to come home with a hundred photos from their day and only two that they like.  I encourage friends to turn off their pop up flash and try some of the manual settings.  But, after a few blurred pictures they turn it back to the auto settings.  Who wants to miss their kid blowing out the candles on their birthday or the first time they ride a bike?  The kids would be saying, “The pictures of me at my birthdays were all blurry because my mom was fooling with her camera.”

Simple Technical Information: If you are willing to make some mistakes, turn off the pop up flash.  No one looks natural with a flash directly on their face.  It flattens features and creates unnatural shadows.  The haircut photo was taken with a flash mounted on the camera and bouncing on the wall over my left shoulder.  When I use flash, this is what I usually do.  I fool around with the direction of the flash until it looks right. When there’s not enough light or the lighting is poor, (this room had only overhead fluorescent lights) a flash can make things work. 

Full Hands

I was leaving the library, carrying books and keeping three little ones from walking into a busy street.  My middle girl was standing directly behind me, out of view.  I was turning from side to side looking for her.  The man who held the door for us said, “Looks like you’ve got your hands full.”  I do.  It’s easy to see when I’m out in the world.  I often feel like a mother duck clucking to my ducklings as we cross streets and navigate stores together. 

What is easy for a stranger on the street to see is sometimes hard for me to remember.  I wonder why I don’t get more done.  Why is there a pile clothes in sizes no one can currently wear in the corner of my bedroom?  Why do phone calls and emails go unanswered and birthday cards go unsent?  Why is it so hard to get the pictures I take of friends’ kids back to them?  Why am I not doing more with my photography?

That last question is the one that is most on my mind recently.  Positive comments about my photos often end with suggestions about what I could do with my work – start a business, put together a book… I always appreciate the comments and suggestions.  I think about the same things myself.  Who doesn’t want to be recognized and paid for what they do well and enjoy doing?  I look around me.  There are plenty of examples of mothers who accomplish all sorts of things while at the same time raising their children.  At the same time, I’ve made choices.  We’re going on four kids.  I homeschool them.  I look at them and love what is filling my days.  I also am aware that they will not always be who they are today and will need much less from me as they grow.  When that happens, will I find that the ship has sailed without me?  Or will I be glad that I was with them when they were small?

I give an answer about what I do or don’t do with my photography that sometimes sounds hollow and other times rings true.  I say, “Right now, I’ve got my hands full.”

Simple Technical Information: When I first got my digital camera, I was happy with my photos “straight out of the camera” or unedited. (If you see someone refer to their photo as “SOOC” this is what they are talking about.)  I would upload the photos from my card into iphoto and admire them as they were.  Soon I started using the editing in iphoto.  I’d add some blacks, adjust the white balance, or convert an image to black and white. 

Then I started poking around in Lightroom.  There was so much there to work with that I was overwhelmed.  I didn’t know what half of the adjustments were.  I really started to enjoy editing when I was doing a photo a day for my 365 Project.  I could learn about the adjustments a little at a time.

Now, I don’t feel like a photo is presentable without some amount of editing.  Here is what this photo looked like straight out of the camera.

 Converting it to black and white was an easy choice.  The colors didn’t add anything to the image (even though I do like the green hair elastic).  I cropped it.  Cropping is a very subjective process.  I go back and forth with the cropping while doing other editing.  I try to get rid of distracting elements and balance the picture.  In this one, I liked the part of my daughter’s face that was in the frame, but it drew my eyes to her face instead of keeping the focus on the hands.

I think of my original photo like a first draft.  Sometimes more rewriting needs to be done.  Sometimes very little. 

Benches: Late Winter

I was enjoying the idea of packing up the snowsuits and boots that litter the entrance to our house. But, I’d rather leave them out a little too long than to have to go back to the basement for them. I have learned that winter doesn’t give up so easily and that the march toward spring is not without twists and turns.

It would be easier if things moved in a straight line.

My baby sleeps all night for a week and not again for months. She doesn’t need a diaper for weeks and then, “Honey? Are you peeing on the floor?!?” She loves broccoli and then complains when it appears on her plate. What is wrong with her?

All week the kids enjoy each other’s company, the laundry is clean, we laugh easily and their schoolwork is done with enthusiasm. We’ve figured it out. Then, cold air blows in from the north and nothing is quite right. Fights break out, the laundry piles grow and I look at the clock thinking, “Is it too early to put them to bed?” What am I doing wrong?

While working on my 365 Project last year, I would enjoy some days of success. I was excited to carry my camera, I had more ideas than I knew what to do with and I watched encouraging comments on my Flickr page flow in. I loved the project. I was on a roll. Until I wasn’t. I would look a the photos from the day and think, “Really? This is the best I could do today? I have to post one of these?” No one had anything to say about my work, and who could blame them? I wanted to throw in the towel. Why did I say I would do this? 

I trust the progress of the seasons regardless of the 180 degree turns. And now on to trusting my own progress and the paths my children take as they grow.

This snowdrop did not shrivel when the snow came back. Tomorrow it may see some sunshine.

Snowdrops

Simple Technical Information: Both of these photos were taken with my new 100mm macro lens. For the first photo I wasn’t using its macro capabilities, and in the second I was. My interest in macro (close up) photography is new to me. Before last year, my photos were focused on people. But, committing to produce a photo every day pushed me to look for other subjects. In the past, I have used my 50mm lens for close ups because it was the better of the two lenses I owned. A non-macro 50mm lens requires eighteen inches between the lens and the subject so I would crop the photo for a close up look. That was working to an extent but I’m glad I have this new lens to work with. 

There are small mounds of dirty snow where it was piled during our last snowfall. The trees are bare. Numerous puddles dot the path. Coats are on and gloves are on standby in everyone’s pockets. By the standards of early March, it’s a beautiful day. 

We are ready for a bike ride. It’s been months since the helmets have been on and the bikes have been rolling. 

 Cheeks are rosy. Hands are cold. Noses are runny. 

After a winter of days spent mostly indoors, this is freedom.

The eager days of late winter will pass and soon a day like this will be reason to stay inside or at the very least, complain. Until then, we’re looking for snowdrops, steering around puddles and merrily rolling towards spring.

 Simple Technical Information: This last photo is an example of a technique known as panning. I discovered it last spring when then kids got their bikes out. I had seen it used before but mostly for car and bike racing. During sledding season last year, I tried to capture the excitement of a sled ride. My photos ended up looking like a kid sitting still in the snow. One day on Flickr, I saw a panning shot of sledding. YES! The sleds were packed away, but the kids were still moving. I started to practice panning. 

Panning captures motion by slowing the shutter to blur the background while following the subject’s motion with the camera to keep it in focus. It takes practice and a high tolerance for completely blurred shots. But with digital photography, mistakes are free. 

I used shutter priority (Tv) and set the shutter to 1/40 for this shot. The aperture was 8.0. I waited for him to ride past, focused and moved the camera as he was passing to get the shot. It was the only pan from the afternoon that worked.

I’ve always loved libraries. I grew up in a small town whose library consisted of one big room. I loved everything about the place. Now I live in a city with quite a few branches within ten minutes of my home. We aren’t faithful to just one of the libraries. We enjoy many. The kids have names for all of them. The photo above is from the Squishy Chair Library.

These are from the Cookie Library. There is often a tray of (very ordinary) cookies in the main room. It’s an old building with these tall windows and lots of beautiful, dark wood.

And finally, the Window Library. It has wonderful window boxes to sit in and this unforgettable chair.

Who loves the libraries? Me? Them? Us? It’s a love I share with them. When I say, “Let’s go to the library,” they get on their coats and shoes. That’s love.

Simple Technical Information: From these photos it may appear that my kids regularly sit themselves down in well lit spots and become engrossed in books. There is some truth in that. They do sit down many times and read. But, there is also some guidance from their camera wielding mother. Most often it’s a suggestion about where to sit. Sometimes, it’s an all out set up. “Here’s a book. Will you sit over by that window and pretend to read it?” This may or may not be followed by a little bribe. “Yes. As soon as we’re done you can look at the DVD’s.”

Worn Out

Sleeping all night is no longer possible. During the day, I try to make up for it. My mind is not as tired as my body and is usually still going at normal speed, noticing all the things that I would like to get done. My body has other ideas. I have to stop, if only for a few minutes.

It’s often said that the sleeplessness of late pregnancy helps mothers prepare for the sleepless nights to come. This always bothered me. Prepare for being tired by being tired? Seems like saving up sleep like a hibernating bear would be a better idea. But there is something true about the irksome comment. I am preparing for a different pace of daily life. One that is driven not by what needs to be done in my eyes but by a very small person’s very basic needs. For now, I have to ask for help doing things that I am used to doing myself and more often than I’m used to say,”No. I can’t do that today.” And put my feet up whenever I can.

Simple Technical Information: A photo like this, with only a small part in focus, is produced by a wide open aperture. (Aperture refers to the size of the opening inside the lens that allows more or less light to get to the sensor as the photo is taken.) When the opening is big, the amount that is in focus is small. The numbers on the camera’s display that refer to aperture are 3.5, 4.0, 45 up to 22 or higher. The smaller numbers mean a wider opening. So, small numbers = small amount in focus. This was taken at 2.0. The smallest number on a lens that comes with a Canon Rebel or Nikon D60 is 3.5. You can still do this, but not as dramatically. If you like the effect, you can buy a different lens that has a larger opening (smaller number).